Friday, March 16, 2012

Continuing Chronicles Of The Manbbatical: You Can't Always Get What You Want.

The completion of my yearlong dong-diet came to an end almost a year ago. In it’s wayward way, time has flown by equally fast as it has crawled by. What’s occurred in the months SINCE I started getting boned again has been WAAAAY more edifying than abstinence (I’m not quite sure why that surprises me)! While undergoing the process of The Manbbatical, I had nothing but time to reflect on what I thought I wanted in terms of a romantic relationship. Now that I can indulge myself with a partner… I’m not sure I actually WANT to. To be fair my life has changed completely since last year; I live in Los Angeles now. Away from my family, country, climate, etc. I’ve had to go back to the beginning on everything, which feels even parts freeing (a new start!), humbling (no one in America gives a shit about what you’ve done in Canada unless you’re Kelly Oxford), and terrifying (I've pulverized everything I've known and worked for). More than anything it’s exciting. LA lights a fire under my ass. People here have a unique grade of determination that’s palpable. I’ve had opportunities to meet people whom I’ve admired for years. Inspiration isn’t hard to come by in these parts. My new, shiny life has illuminated the fact that I did this alone A.K.A. no boyfriend. (To be clear: I NEVER could have done this without the help of friends BAIT, GARY ST.KEVIN, his girlfriend KEVIN ST.GARY, or my mother.) A friend here told me that LA can be like a mechanical bull: daring you to take a ride, while inauspiciously doing all it can to buck you off into the sand. It might have felt nice to have a partner to share this all with. It might have. There but for the grace of God go I, if you believe in that kind of horseshit. ÇA-RAGE & I had a long talk about what you think you want as opposed to what you actually want. I’ve kept my head in the sand, denying that the two might be different. I get laid when I need to get laid. I'll quit bragging. I just know that if I feel like I want company, heat in my bed or a man to feel- I make it happen. When you want it, it can be found. Luckily I know really great, interesting men that I trust and am attracted to. Our relationships consist of (mostly) friendship and hot lovin’ when nights get cold or lonely. Meanwhile, I live my life exactly how I please and have very little responsibility to anyone but myself. I have amazing friends here; I love my home, and am pursuing my dream without compromise. Most of my friends in relationships are happy, but romantic/committed relationships come with their own problems. It’s a weird feeling, but for the first time I can remember I have no desire for that brand of problems. I can’t conceive of being in a “real” relationship at this point- it doesn’t seem that interesting at the moment. When I weigh out what makes what fulfills me at my core… my perspective has changed. AT least I hope it’s my perspective and not that I can’t actually GET a boyfriend. Yikes. I think I thought I wanted something that most people have or need. It turns out what I think I want is what I already have. But I can't be sure.

9 comments:

JoJo said...

I checked your blog yesterday night for the first time since you moved. Today you post something!? SO weird.

I'm happy L.A. is loving you:)

mark said...

Well Said! You have a friend here!

Anonymous said...

COME TO MONTREAL !!!! Alain :)

Jacqueline said...

I was crushed when my lover of three years left to be with another woman. I cried and sobbed every day, until it got so bad that I reached out to the Internet for help and i saw a testimony of a spell caster who help a girl called Eunice and i said let me give it a try so i contact him for help and he cast a love spell for me which i use in getting my love back and now i am a happy woman. For what this priest have done for me, i will not stop to publish your good work to people out there. Contact him on templeofpermanenthealing@gmail.com is the only answer to your problems templeofpermanenthealing@gmail.com

Jacqueline

Shamiela Abader said...

I lost my marriage of 4 years which caused me so much pains and agony. I was duped several times while trying to get him back by fake prophets and one fake Doctor from Asia. But my story changed when I met Priest of temple of permanent healing and he brought back my love without charging me for his services. Contact him today through templeofpermanenthealing@gmail.com and have your lost love back, his services are free.

Shamiela Abader

Charlot said...

I want to give thanks to a great man who has brought back happiness and dignity into my life. The Priest is really a great Man after my lover left me for 2 years, i was so frustrated and almost took my life until i came in-contact with The Priest who told me that my ex will be back to me within 3 days. At first i was nervous and taught he was a scam until the second day when my lover called me on phone and started begging me that he was sorry that i should forgive him. He surprises me the 3rd day by buying me diamond ring as my engagement ring. I was so happy and really believed that priest is really a great spell caster and not a scam like other fake spell caster who are online. We got married three weeks ago and i must tell the world that the priest is nice and truthful man and anyone who need help should can contact him on his private email address templeofpermanenthealing@hotmail.com

Charlot

Busisiwe Mabuza said...

My name is Busisiwe Mabuza and i am from South Africa. I want to share my life testimony with the entire people of the world. I am very grateful for the good work Priest did for me, I was HIV patient, everything went bad for me, I couldn't do things with my friends anymore and also lost my job when boss discovered that i am HIV positive and the virus was already affecting my advertising beauty. I lost everything and all i was waiting for is death, I went searching on the internet I saw many testimonies on how different spell casters helped people in curing their deadly diseases and i also saw how many people where scammed by spell casters. I was confused on what to believe but one day, i decided to contact the email of one Priest which i saw on health care website. I emailed him and he answered me, I told him all the problem that i am passing through and requested for my information and told me that I will be free from the deadly disease. He send me herbal medicine 3 days after i contact him through DHL. I took the medication in accordance to his prescription and after 14 days i went for a test. I was surprised that i tested negative. I visited 4 different hospital for test and the result was negative. I was shocked because i never believe that i will be free from this deadly virus and today i am ready to tell the whole world how this good man helped me in case there is anyone passing through any deadly sickness. He is the only solution to any deadly sickness and i trust him so much. Anyone that needs his help should contact him through his email address: templeofpermanenthealing@hotmail.com and he will help you.

Robert Connor said...

I am Connor Robert from Scotland I have been playing euro million since i was 15 and i have never won and i decided to stop instead of i wasting my money in buying ticket. One day i saw a friend who told me that there is a spell caster in Africa that can help win this lottery he was so sure of it but what keep him wondering is that he was not sure if he can make me win big. I say let me give a try because i was so curious in becoming a millionaire so that flint round bitches. I decided to give a try and he assure me in 3days i will get result and immediately i went to buy ticket with the number he sent me and i did just that so for sure in 3days time result was out and i was a winner of £2million. I could not rejoice too much cause i was expecting this but was not sure if it really work but now that i have tested it and it work i will forever be grateful to this spell caster and my friend. When i went to show appreciation to him, he told me that he is here to help people who are in needs. The offer to show appreciation to this man is to spread his name across the world so that people will be helped and that is the reason i am online. Do not waste time the email is templeofpermanenthealing@hotmail.com he is the only help you need.

Lisa Kelvin said...


have be sick for cancer for the pass 2 years and my Husband left me for another woman because of my illness and i have be seeking for help, i was told to provide £8,500 pounds for the operation and i have be saving to make sure the operation is done but i was only able to save £3500 pounds. when i was searching through the internet, i met with 2 different spell casters who took my £ 2,000 pounds and they never helped me. When i went to see my sister in Auckland, New Zealand, a friend who i met at my sister house directed me to Dr. UKO who has help him cast a spell and i never believe in spell. I contacted the man with the email and requested for a healing and return my Husband back spell and he told me i will be heal in 19 days after the spell have be cast on me so that was how it all started with my wife who left me for another man then after 5 days, i started seeing changes in my body, i was very surprise that on the 14th days my cancer was ill. On the 17th day my Husband was back with more apology and we are presently united. I want every one out there to help me thank Dr. UKO for the life he has restored. Who ever need help should contact him through ukospelltemple@yahoo.com

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